PART III: COLLEEN'S ICU INTERLUDE
Before leaving Col's ICU bedside, I spoke again to the nurse standing opposite me. "Is my sister sufficiently sedated to protect her from feeling extreme distress when she becomes fully conscious of the breathing tube?" 

"Oh, yeah, you mean if she gets crazy?" she said with a jokey tone.

I heard myself forcefully saying back to her, "Do not use the word 'crazy' about or around my sister. Do not. And this is not funny." 

I left to speak to Colleen's ICU doctor, the same Dr. Tottenham, who had called me to ask about Colleen's DNR wishes. She had found out for me that the pacemaker procedure had gone well. I registered the good news dispassionately. The doctor proceeded directly to asking for my approvals on treatments that might be necessary to perform on Colleen within the next twenty minutes. Her blood pressure had plummeted to dangerously low levels. Dopamine had been administered immediately to bring them back up but, the doctor explained, dopamine is dangerous in itself at higher or prolonged dosages. If Colleen's blood pressure fails to return to normal in the next twenty minutes, drugs other than dopamine would need to be given. And administering these alternative drugs would require putting in a "central line," probably on the right side of Colleen's neck. 

At this point, I'm reeling. Nineteen minutes to go? Eighteen?

"I don't know what a central line is," I tell her. "It sounds big."

She used her hands to illustrate eight inches. "It will allow us to administer multiple medications," she said. "And we most likely will also have to put in an arterial line, but that can be inserted into the groin area."

"I need to contact Colleen's doctor before I sign anything," I said. "By the way, I am not comfortable with one of the nurses taking care of my sister. Her choice of words within earshot of my sister was highly insensitive. I do not want her in the same room with my sister. I do not want anyone near her who could hurt her in any way." (The nurse was removed.)

I dashed off the following email to Dr. Mathai, whom I knew must have gone home from the hospital by now:

       
       8:53 PM, Monday, May 13, 2013
       SUBJECT: Need You
       Please call me. Colleen is in ICU, as
       you probably know. On a ventilator.
       The ICU MD wants to do all kinds of
       things with all kinds of risks.
       Mignon 310-889-8583