Valerie Harper

What a role model! Valerie's interview with Meredith on TV tonight revealed a woman of strength, forward thinking and love. She didn't sugarcoat the gruesome challenge she faces but shows her determination to live in the present with a positive attitude. She has her moments of fear but she's not wallowing in her circumstance. Each day is a new day, roll baby roll. Now, she's out there on the dance floor. I'm blown away.
Valerie's comments about keeping notes and records is a great idea. I've done it for years though I would ask one of my sisters to take the notes. I would often feel like a "deer in headlights" trying to take in what doctors were explaining to me. I also keep a old fashioned 3 ring notebook with copies of all my tests. It does give you a feeling of control. And, there is so much information to absorb, the notes become invaluable.
While listening to Valerie's challenges, you realize that so many of us have obstacles to battle and we all must face death. Try to take solace in that, make the most of your day, and breathe..in and out

Colleen is smooth to my messy. Even when we went to Pittsburgh for Colleen's lung transplant evaluation, her hair was shiny and silky-looking, although she didn't think so. She's timely in her cuts and color. She goes a lighter shade of blonde in summertime. She's got it down, including the blow-dry. In spite of her unfair share of "the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to," including losing all her hair to chemo five years ago as she mentions, her hair has remained enviously thick. Me? I'm beauty salon phobic. Do not like sitting in front of the mirror for an hour (or more). If I go twice a year to the "beauty parlor," an outdated phrase I can't seem to shake, that's good for me. Of course, the cost of a cut and color in this town contribute to infrequent visits too. For instance, a haircut from stylist Sally Hershberger, who's relocated from Manhattan to Beverly Hills, starts at $800. So I remain messy, with years behind me of resolutions to learn how to blow-dry my hair into swinging silk. Or, now, how to use the ceramic wand to create sultry S-waves. I even bought a flat iron some years back. All three hair tools sit nicely in a basket in my "beauty" closet. I happen upon them from time to time and notice the thermal protectant spray from TRESemme I've purchased too. So all the guns are there, I just can't seem to pull the trigger. Colleen breezily attends to her locks. Myself and my hair, on the other hand, get all in a tangle. Viva la difference!

Ode To The Hairdresser

Throughout time and around the world, women fuss over their hair. We cut it, we color it and adorn it with beads, ribbons, shells or whatever we think will enhance our beauty. We do it to look good, to feel good and attract someone special. Thus, the importance of the hairdresser. It's hard to find one and it's hard to give one up. Thankfully, I'm not one of those who needs to direct every snip. Except when I lost all my hair during chemo treatments, it grows pretty fast. So, I don't worry too much over a mishap and I'm always open to change. Often times the hairdresser plays the role of the therapist, listening to our woes about lovers, jobs, children, our self-image. It's hard to give one up when he/she is someone you depend on to make you feel good in these many ways. No doubt you've surmised that I have to change hairdressers. The trip out to Mays Landing takes the wind out of my sails. Leanne, my all time favorite "artist," is a tough one to let go of as she does it all creatively, with a listening ear and positive attitude. Thanks, Leanne.

To: Colleen
From: The Duck Who Won't Get in Line

       Hey, Colleen, it's this simple. I'm a rebel. What else can I say? But you're a rebel too. So I figure if anyone can understand me and why I don't fall into line, it's you. Some of us were just born to be wild, baby. I was born to be a wild duck, and you a wild non-duck. We're the cracks in life that let the light in. I'm getting philosophical there, I know. But you can be wild and philosophical at the same time, right? Forget lines. Forget the illusion of lines. Do you know the tea shop just outside Linesville? The exemplary cute one that's just your cuppa? See you there at noon by the light of the silvery moon?
                                                                      Can't wait to meet up,
                                                                      Your ever lovin' duck
                                                       
                   
     

The Duckling Comes Home

Remember way back in February, I was getting my ducks lined up to take on the lung transplant eval?  A lot has happened I had them all lined up.  Since my last posting, all the ducks scrambled and I was running around as the headless chicken trying to bring them back in a nice neat row.  Well, I found the last duck but I'm still working on the neat row.

There were good days.  At Cape May Point, they honor vets at the sunset ceremony.  They raised my father's flag at sunrise, then in the evening a tribute to him, songs, and the lowering of the flag into the hands of the grandchildren under the direction of WWII Vet, Marvin. He showed the kids how to fold a flag, which is a rare thing these days.  You know how that goes, kids trying to be serious..It was really cool for them and my mother.

My mother Suzanne
& WWII Veteran Marvin

Something to think about to honor your special vets.

There were not such good days.  As a result, despite my efforts, I can no longer live alone.  The silver lining was having a meltdown before my caregiver, Tina, took another job.  She's staying. Each "setback" makes my limitations greater. Sleep is interrupted, breathing is hard, going out...I need a day to get ready and a day to recover.  This poor vessel is trying so hard.  I've read that sometimes you can see things when you take certain drugs.  Now, I wouldn't know about such things but recently during the night I did see a big black furry spider moving laterally on the ceiling above my bed and disappearing into the wall only to reappear on the other side.  FREAKY.  Within the next two days, 3 FB friends had sightings, but they were real.    I haven't looked up what that means in my Indian Medicine cards but I will and let you know in my next entry.  

Time for my evening ride-about!

One final thought, I need to accept that those ducklings will not stay in a neat row, at least not for very long.